


Chasing the moon.

by LadyNox197893



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Abuse, M/M, Marauders Era (Harry Potter), Pack Dynamics
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-14
Updated: 2021-02-19
Packaged: 2021-03-14 17:48:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,496
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29422587
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyNox197893/pseuds/LadyNox197893
Summary: Remus Lupin was bitten by a monster as a child. or so he thinks, but when Dumbledore sends him on a mission to infiltrate Greyback's pack, what will he learn about the monster? what will he learn about himself.
Relationships: Fenrir Greyback & Remus Lupin, Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Comments: 9
Kudos: 5





	1. waking up

Remus groaned as beams of sunlight passed through his eyelids. He didn't open his eyes, not yet. The previous night had been the full moon. He had run with the pack for the first time in his life. And damn did his body hurt. It felt like he had been hit by a ton of bricks. And despite the chill of the morning air on his face he was warm.  _ Someone _ was holding him, he realized with a start. It wasn't a strange occurrence, often at school he would awaken with Sirius, James, and Peter all curled around him in their animal forms. But they were not here. It was just him, on this solo mission for Dumbledore and the Order. Who then, what wolf held him so tightly, warming him with their own body in what his senses told him was an earthen den. Remus opened his eyes finally, blinking in the light as it stung his eyes. He shifted his hand to block the rays as the person holding him grumbled. 

“Damn pup, Go back to sleep. It is too early to be up after the moon.” The voice was soft and soothing, but held a growl in it. A growl that Remus knew in the pit of his stomach. He knew this voice, he had known it since he was a small child. Fenrir Greyback. 

“...What do you want.” Remus had aimed for a growl, he wanted the older wolf to know how angry he was, but all that came out was a whimper, fearful and submissive.

“To sleep more.” Greyback huffed as he sat up releasing Remus from his hold. “I heard you were hanging around the pack, didn’t think you’d join us for a run though.” Remus hesitated before sitting up himself and looking over his shoulder at the older wolf. He was struck by how fit the man looked. And while he was covered in dried mud from the previous night, there didn't seem to be any built up grime there. “Like what you see pup?” Fenrir grinned over at him showing his sharp canines that seemed to be a permanent feature.

“No, I have to go” Remus didn't understand why his voice felt tight, he felt like he could not breath. He had not been having this problem when Greyback had been holding him. ‘  **He is my leader, my Alpha, and my Sire** ‘ his inner wolf seemed to whine at him ‘  **I need to be with him.** ‘ Remus swallowed desperately pushing back against the thoughts. “Not mine…” he muttered weakly.

“What was that pup?” Greyback was watching him. Observing him like he was a child attempting to walk, a child whose efforts were to be giggled about.

“Nothing..” Remus got onto his hands and crawled out of the den with Greyback following behind and grabbing his arm once they were both standing. 

“I did not say you could leave, pet.” Fenrir growled. He enjoyed the way the pup's body stiffened. He noted all the scars he bore with bitterness. The way he could count the pup’s,  _ his pup’s _ , ribs. “Dumbledore abandoned you, they left you with nowhere to go the moment you graduated.” he reached out cupping his chin gently. “I've been waiting for you. Come with me my pup? Let me take you home.”

Remus couldn't think. He wanted to say no. His body trembled with fear and something else emotions he had never felt in all eighteen years of life. His sire wanted to take him home. His instincts, his wolf was firm ‘  **The Alpha is home, I am home with him.** ‘ “...Yes…” he didn't know who he was agreeing to Greyback or Moony. But his heart and body ached to go with the older wolf. 

Fenrir chuckled and took the pups wrist pulling him towards where the pack had stashed their clothes. They both dressed in silence and he was amused at how dazed little Lupin seemed, after so long apart it was clear that their bond between sire and pup was still as strong as ever. He tore his eyes away from Lupin to eye those closest to them. Cain, his most loyal friend and practically co-leader, was eyeing Lupin suspiciously. That was alright, a good thing even, Cain was doing his job of protecting the pack and its most vulnerable members. Close by a few of the woman were tending to the pups, they were kept in a closed off den during the night, but often acquired scraps and bruises. “Easy Cain, The pup is with me.” he grabbed the other man's shoulder as he moved towards Lupin. 

“His wand.” Cain growled his body stiff. Prepared to move in defense. 

Fenrir turned his attention back to his pup and frowned. “I will handle it. Pup.” he called getting the attention of the young wolf. “Come. Give me your wand.” he said firmly, his tone harsher than it had been when they were alone. Lupin needed to learn that his leader’s words were law. His pup only hesitated for a moment before handing over his wand with shaking hands. “Good boy.” he let his voice soften and wrapped his arm around Lupin bringing him close. He handed Cain the wand. “I trust you will keep that safe for the pup.” 

“Of course, Fenrir.” His friend turned and headed away to help get the rest of the pups ready to apparate back to the main den.

Remus swallowed as he watched the other wolf walk away with his wand. And jumped when he was pulled against Greyback's chest. He whimpered again, his breath was shaky. Being away from greyback even for such a short while had given him some clarity. He didn’t understand why he felt content here. But so terrified of that man, that monster who had tormented his dreams for so long. Who had ruined his life and family. As Greyback held him he couldn't stop angry tears that blurred his vision. Greyback it seemed noticed and moved to hide him from the gaze of others. “Back to the den!” he announced loudly causing Lupin to startle. “Don't want them to see your tears pup. Don't worry, you can cry all you want in my private den.” Remus didn't even get a chance to respond before the world spun around them. 

“I don’t…” Remus found his voice again after they had apparated to a new woods. The smells were different. It seemed wetter, there was likely a moor nearby. “Let go.” he pushed against Greyback's chest causing the older wolf to chuckle. The sound seemed to reverberate in his bones.

“I was hoping that you wouldn't start fighting me until we got to the den.” He sounded regretful to the surprise of Remus. And before he could respond the larger wolf scooped him up holding him tighter against his chest as he started walking. “Not above carrying you like the naughty pup you are.” Greyback chuckled again as Remus made an indignant noise his face burned with embarrassment. He hated the idea of Greyback humiliating him like this. “I hate you.” he muttered angry that Greyback didn’t even stop. 

“I know little one. We have a lot to discuss.” Greyback didn’t falter as they approached a large waterfall and slipped behind it following the rest of the pack down a tunnel and into a large cavern. Lupin craned his neck trying to get a good look at the area. He saw cots lined up in neat rows. Some of them seemed closer together and he guessed they were for families, parents and their pups. All the beds were lined with furs, there was what looked to be a cooking area, stacks of plates. It startled him how normal this all looked. “Easy pup. I’ll give you the grand tour later.” Greyback chuckled again and headed back towards a large iron door. 

“Wait, where are we.. Where are you taking me?” Remus struggled against Greyback's hold to no avail. 

“Relax, I won't hurt you. It's just my private quarters.” Fenrir sighed and pushed the door open, glad he had left it ajar the night before. He looked around for a moment before setting Lupin down on the bed. He didn’t like using magic but he did so anyways to shut and lock the door. The pup finched on the bed pulling his knees to his chest and turned his face away from him. “Oh come now. I just want to talk.” he sat down on his bed and leaned back into the pile of pillows. As the leader, he had a larger bed in his quarters, and above his head a hole to let in the glorious moonlight. 

“I don’t want to talk to you. I just want to go..”

“Go? Go where? There is nowhere to go for us. Nowhere but with a pack.” He couldn't help but scoff at the youngster.

“You did this to me! I could have had a life, I.. I’m trying. I take every job I can..I-”

“You skip more meals than you eat, you have a former workplace list longer than your arms at.. What nineteen?” 

“.. Eighteen...and yeah I try but.. It doesn't take much for wizards to notice a pattern, and muggles require other documents.. Again this is your fault.”

“I gave you a gift pup… didn’t think you’d survive honestly. Plenty of bitten pups don’t. But you did… you impressed me and I realized you were special” he yawned the day after the full moon, everyone was always exhausted, odd to think how tiring it was to chase after the moon. 

“I’m not special… I’m a monster.” After a moment his pup joined him laying down on the bed. He couldn't help but grin slightly, he shifted and pulled the unhappy young wolf into his chest again.

“Some monster.. Let me get a look at you.” He buried a hand in the soft curls of the pup and gently tilted his head up. He met Lupin's gaze for a while before he smiled and laughed softly. “No, I don't see any monster there… do you?”

‘Do i?’ Remus had never thought about that before, obviously every time he looked in the mirror the answer was yes. But being around the pack, seeing even briefly how they live together. Laying here feeling.. Safe, In Greybacks arms. Suddenly he had to think about that. Did he see a monster? In those amber eyes, the eyes that had haunted his dreams since that night, they seemed so different now. “I...I don't know.” He admitted letting out a shaky breath. He gasped softly as Greyback pulled on his hair more, and prayed to whatever god there was that his body wouldn’t react like it did for sirius. 

“What was that pup?” oh god he sounded amused.

“It's nothing.” He leaned his head back more to alleviate some of the pain. 

“Really? After last night you are still wanting more?” He barked out a laugh and let go of Remus hair. “Maybe later pup. I’m tired.” 

Remus felt like his brain had crashed. “What do you mean? What happened last night?” he felt panic and a pit forming in his stomach. It only worsened when Greyback laughed.

“Oh come on. You are smart, I know you graduated from hogwarts. Put two and two together, pet.” the elder wolf replied lazily as he turned away to curl into the pelts on the bed. Remus really didn't want to do that, he knew the implications of his words and briefly he wondered how Greyback knew what had happened. He sulked a little and moved further away on the bed against the cave wall. He hated this, he hated being here with the man that bit him, hated Dumbledore for sending him, hated his parents for throwing him out, telling everyone their son had died in an unfortunate accident. Not that they hadn’t long considered him dead. Remus sighed and pulled one of the pelts around himself. Greyback had a point, they should rest after such a long and apparently eventful night.

Fenrir woke up as the sun was above him shing down into his den. The sun didn't seem to be what woke him though and it took him a moment to realize it was whimpers of pain. He was suddenly more aware and sat up half expecting to see someone hurting his pup, though rationally he knew no one would dare to come in here uninvited. Instead he saw Lupin curled up at the head of the bed clinging to a pelt like it was his lifeline. His scarred cheeks were stained with tears and he was whimpering out words almost too quiet to make out. He’d seen this before, but normally among the younger pups that were brought into the pack. Traumatized from their attacks, and from the betrayal of their families. He moved and pulled the younger wolf into his lap. “It's alright now pup. I’m here for you.” he said, his movements seemed to wake Lupin up a bit as his words became more clear.

“I’m still here mum...Please I’m still here.” Fresh tears ran down Lupin's face as he turned and buried it in Fenrir's chest. Those words caught him off guard. It had never really occurred to him how Lyall and his wife had treated their son. They had kept him, sent him to school, He had assumed that meant they cared for their son enough. Though that begged the question as to why Remus had been alone, starving, scraping to make a living. “Wake up little one.” he said, shifting again causing Lupin to crack open his eyes. It took a moment but as he had expected his pup squirmed against him to be released from his grasp. This time he obliged. “Good… come on, they should have food ready by now.”

“Food?”

He couldn’t help but chuckle again. “Yes food. I am sure you saw the kitchen.” Fenrir got up and pulled Lupin to his feet. They exited his den and as he expected lunch was underway. Technically he should have made sure his pup had breakfast, but they had killed and shared a deer last night. “Anya, have you eaten?” he asked, seeing a blond wolf tending to the cubs ensuring that they ate their fill. 

“Not yet, but the pups and the rest of the pack are fed. You should eat Fenrir, you skipped lunch yesterday.” The Russian wolf gave him a stern look, there was a reason she was such a good mother. He felt like he was being scolded. 

“I will eat when you do. But my pup needs to eat now.” he looked over at Lupin who seemed to be curious about Anya’s presence. He could not blame him though, the little one knew almost nothing of wolf affairs. Nothing of the slaughter of their people in the Soviet Union. He went over to the pot of food and dished out a plate for remus. There wasn’t really enough for him to eat, Anya would have to settle for him skipping another meal. 

“You don't eat?” His pup asked timidly clearly unsure if that was an appropriate question to ask. 

“I eat, but the pack needs to eat first. That includes you.”

Remus stared at Greyback for a moment unsure what to do with this revelation. He had always thought of him as cruel and selfish. But here was proof indisputable that Greyback put the other wolves before himself. ‘ **Like a good leader, because he is home.** ’ His inner wolf said. ‘ **Because I am his pup, and his pack!** ’ Remus shook his head angrily, shoving the thoughts aside. He couldn’t let his wolf take over, not like it had this morning, and gotten himself into this mess.He looked at the food and took a bite, he was surprised at how good it tasted, though for three years he had lived off instant raman, so anything else tasted like heaven to him at this point.

“You really are starving aren't you little one?” he looked up from his food seeing greyback watching him intensely with furrowed brows. 

“..As I said.. I can barely get a job.” he muttered not wanting to speak up with so many other wolves around. He didn't trust them, not as much as he distrusted Greyback but still.

“Well I can’t fault you for trying, I’m just sorry that it took you so long to realize it wouldn't happen.”

“I haven’t given up yet… I just.. Needed to be around.. Someone.” not a lie. He had had a fight with Sirius about a year previous. While they were on slight speaking terms again, he was lonely. It was part of why he had agreed to spy for Dumbledore. 

“.. You really are a stubborn pup aren’t you?”

“..Yes.” Remus jumped slightly when Greyback laughed and put a hand on his head. 

“How about this. Stay for the rest of the week. And then you can go if you want. I’ll always welcome my pup back.” Remus thought for a moment then nodded. A week. That would give him enough time to... he frowned. It took him longer than it should have to remember that this was a mission for Dumbledore. And if he was honest, he wanted to lie, he didn’t want to put the pack and its pups at risk.

“Atta boy.” greyback grinned and ruffled his hair almost affectionately. It made his heart drop remembering how Sirius and James would do the same thing. He finished eating and was surprised as another pack member came over to take it. 

“Um… do they need help washing the plates?”

“Don't worry about it. It's that group's day to do the dishes. We’ll get you set up in the rotation once you stop reeking of fear.” 

“I… you can smell that?” Remus felt his face burn again. It would make sense, Greyback was more wolf than human at this point.

“I can, and so can you. I’ve got a lot to teach you about being a wolf.” Fenrir frowned thinking about how stunted his pup had been. He’d tried to acquire him, a few months after the initial bite. When he had learned that Remus had survived. Lyall had been waiting for him though. Had set up traps and wards, given him the clear message, or what he had read as a clear message, that they were going to keep their son. He should have known better. He knew what kind of man Lyall was behind closed doors, he’d watched the family for months. He wondered briefly if Lyall had continued to hit his son after the bite. But this wasn't the place to ask that. “Come on little one. I have duties to attend to, and you need to go back into my room.” He got to his feet and pulled Lupin up with him. 

“Wha- why?” His pup squirmed in his grasp clearly unhappy about this.

“Because your leader said so. Your first lesson little one. My word is law.” He growled. His tone was firm but not cruel and it had an almost instant effect on the young wolf. He watched as the pups eyes grew wide before he dropped his gaze and tilted his head slightly to show his neck. An instinctual, submissive gesture. Fenrir eyed the exposed neck, he wanted to sink his teeth in at that moment. But it was too early for that. Their bond had to be nurtured before he could mark Lupin as his in a way that would be clear to all others. “Good.” he muttered and headed back to his room with his pup following behind hesitantly. Once they were in the privacy of his room he sighed. “There's a bathroom through that passage. I’ll leave some clean clothes for you on the bed.” He expected a response but instead heard soft sniffles. Apparently he was crying again, frustrating. “What is it now, pet?” He grabbed him by the hair and pulled his head up receiving a whimper.

“N-nothing, I.. Im sorry.”

“Nothing? Then why are you crying? Is it your friends? Your family? The humans that abandoned you aren't worth your tears.” his voice softened and with his free hand he carefully wiped some tears from the pups face.

“I'm not mad at them!” Lupin tried to pull away from his touch, turning his head as much as he was allowed. “I pushed them away, it was my fault.. my friends didn't leave me!” 

“And why did you push them away. How did they treat you, How did your family treat you?” Fenrir asked, refusing to release the pup from his hold. He would not coddle him too much. He needed to toughen if he was going to be allowed unsupervised with the rest of the pack. 

“..I… Sirius wanted to let me live with him.. His uncle left him more than enough money...I didn’t want to be paid for by him.” Lupin it seemed didn’t want to answer the question about his family. 

“Sirius? An unfortunate name, not unlike your own, huh?” Fenrir couldn’t stop his smirk from forming. “He knew the truth, but not enough to know that a wolf wants to provide, you want to help your pack.”

“Yes.. I want to help. I don't want to be.. Shut away doing nothing all my life.” 

“Is that what Lyall did to you?”

“I don't want to talk about dad... it doesn't matter they haven't spoken to me in years.”

“When did they stop?” Just the time frame would be helpful in determining how long his pup had been suffering. 

“.... when I left for my last year at hogwarts.. Well a few weeks before.. I.. Stayed with James… another friend.” The pup swallowed like there was more to the memory than he wanted to say.

“I see. And how did they treat you?” 

“... His parents were kind to me. They always were, they made sure I had new clothes and got me birthday presents… Monty held back Sirius when dad dropped me off…”

“He had to hold your friend back because?” he dared to press the issue, and let go of his pups hair. Lupin stepped back and wiped at his eyes more.

“Because he hates my dad.. Because they gave me nothing but what I needed to survive. That and a cage in a freezing, leaking cellar.” The young wolf’s voice cracked with bitterness and pain. “They acted like that was what I had to look forward to after they wrote me off. That's what everyone besides my friends told me too…. That's what i'm worth to them, drafty houses, rats.. That I am a vermin…”

“You aren't vermin, my little one. You are precious and special. You are a survivor.. You wanted to live… And.. I should have fought harder for you.” Lupin was being vulnerable with him. It was early, but he had some cards to play. “I tried to get you, when I learned you had survived your transformations. Lyall was waiting for me. He was determined to keep you. I never should have let him. I knew how he treated you and your mother before the bite.”

Remus binked up at Greyback trying to comprehend his words. He didn't understand what the elder wolf was talking about. “Dad was hurt by what you did. He was just scared.” he barely noticed how hard he had clenched his fist. His nails digging into his palms and his knuckles turning white. 

“Mmm is that what you have been telling yourself since that night? How many times did your mother fall down the stairs? Or slip in the kitchen? How many trips to a healer because all of sudden she was clumsy.” Greyback’s voice was soft, and seemed full of concern and guilt. Remus winced, he’d noticed and had always blamed himself. If he wasn't a monster if he.. He startled as a memory flashed through his mind long locked away and forgotten. Of crying at his bedroom window. Of a man coming out of the forest to sit by him. To listen to his wishes for daddy to stop hitting him. Of that man promising him that one day soon he’d ensure daddy would never hit him again. Remus felt weak and sick as he realized that he had let him in. He had done what the man, what greyback had asked him to do. Leave his bedroom window open after his parents went to bed. “... So you do remember pup.. Don’t get me wrong. I wanted revenge against your father.”

“...I was a child and you lied to me.” Remus felt even worse now, he felt lost. His father had not cared for him even before the bite, and Greyback had tricked him. ‘ **But he tried to get me away from him. Sire stopped dad from hitting me, he told the truth.** ’ 

“I did not lie. No more than I had to. Little one, I need you to trust me. After so long you are home, safe with the pack as you should be.”

“Home…” Remus repeated biting his lip hard at the thought. When had he last felt at home? Certainly not when he went back to his parents house during the school year. And even Hogwarts felt like a prison sometimes, the wolf yeared to be outside, to run through the forest and smell the earth. Home was… with Sirius, James, and Peter. It had not mattered where they were, as long as they were together it had been home. But that was over now. He had turned down Sirius’ offer to provide for him. James had Lilly, they were planning to be married. He did not know what Peter was up to, but he had only seen him at meetings. 

“I can give you a home, my little one. You have to be the one to accept it.” Greyback reached out and pulled remus lip free from his bite and Remus left out a sigh leaning into his hand. “Just for two weeks.” The older wolf said, Remus nodded. 

“Two weeks...” He repeated


	2. Meetings

Two weeks had passed faster than Remus would have liked and now he sat awkwardly waiting for the order meeting to end. He had apologized, claimed that Greyback had been keeping too close of an eye on him after he had joined the pack for a run. Sirius had been worried, even now his friend was shooting him worried glances as others gave their reports. He was barely listening, his mind was too preoccupied being away from Greyback and the pack. The past few weeks had been mostly uneventful, after a stressful and emotional first day and night he had been able to use his time alone to sort through his emotions. When he was rational he had been able to see that he had been a scared child making an impossible choice, he’d let Greyback in because it was his only option at the time. That conclusion had brought him comfort, not as much, he had noted with bitterness as the scent and warmth of greyback. Even now, he was wearing a jacket he had taken from the older wolf. It smelled like him, like smoke and pine trees, and even being away from him the scent was intoxicating. He felt relief when the meeting came to an end and the room started to empty and got up to leave as well. Remus jumped when his arm was grabbed. 

“God moony, you scared the hell out of me.” Sirius looked pained and tired. “Dumbledore said you had gone to spy and you didn’t come back.”

“...I know i'm sorry I… I didn’t have a choice. Greyback saw me.” ‘It wasn’t a lie’, he told himself, Greyback had kept him for those weeks.

“Did the bastard hurt you?” Sirius touched his face gently, the movement made Remus want to melt, want to sink into his arms and just stay there. But his words, meant to insult Greyback, enraged his wolf.

‘ **He dares to insult my sire** !’it howled, and Remus pushed back. ‘He doesn’t know, he didn’t see him like I did.’ He had long gotten used to reasoning with the wolf. Or rather how to suppress it. “No.. I wish he had.” Remus said his voice barely above a whisper. He did not want to talk about this here and thankfully Sirius seemed to understand. 

“Come on Remus, Let's go back to my place.” He took Remus’ hand and squeezed it reassuringly. That sounded good to Remus, the flat was familiar, safe, even the wolf agreed with that. 

“Please…” Remus buried himself in the arms of the other man and sighed in relief when he apparated them both away. 

* * *

  
  


‘These deatheater meetings were awful.’ Fenrir sighed mentaly as he listened to the Dark Lords marked followers discuss their latest raid, who had been marked as a target, who had gotten away, ect. He had of course missed a meeting in the middle of the week. And he had a feeling the Dark Lord did not approve of his absence. 

“You’ve been quiet, Greyback.” the man at the head of the table remarked narrowing his eyes at the wolf.

“...My apologies, I was just taking note of everything I've missed over the week. It seems that you’ve all been very busy.” he met Voldemort's gaze and did not falter. “I am sorry for my absence as well, though I was informed that Uma was able to handle your request.” he let his eyes flick over to the side of the room where a young woman, about the same age of Lupin sat with a small group of similarly aged wolves. His daughter, seventeen years old, and absolutely enthralled by the promises of the Dark Lord. 

“She did, though she had left a bigger mess than what I had wanted.” There was thankfully a hint of amusement in the man's eyes. “Why were you unable to join us?” 

Fenrir frowned he had known the question was coming and had dreaded answering. “A… pup of mine rejoined the pack on the full moon. I had to stay by his side for the week in order to cement our bond as sire and pup. It is a fragile process that could not be interrupted.” He could smell his daughter's mood shift, she had always been possessive of her only living parent. 

“A pup?” Voldemort shifted his gaze over to Uma as well seemingly amused at her reaction.

“Well I call him pup, the only child I ever bit. He is almost an adult now, not that you could tell with all his whimpering.” 

“Does this pup have a name?” 

“Yes..” Fenrir hesitated, he wasn’t sure that he wanted to out Lupin to this group. Some of them likely went to school with him. But the way Voldemort narrowed his eyes at him made it clear he wanted answers. “Remus Lupin.” As he had expected there was a reaction. Though it was actually different than he had expected. Everyone went quiet until one spoke up.

“Oh god Severus you weren’t kidding?”

“Finally...No I wasn't kidding but none of you ever believed me.” Fenrir raised an eyebrow at the young man that spoke up. His hair was greasy and his eyes were dark. But the look of smugness pissed him off and he couldn't keep the growl down. 

“I thought you just hated him for being friends with Potter and Black.” One of the more oblivious deatheaters asked, the young man identified as Severus looked like he was going to respond but went quiet hearing Fenrir’s growl. Fenrir glanced at Voldemort who had a look of amusement on his face.

“No biting Fenrir.” The Dark Lord chuckled and signaled for the subject to be dropped. Fenrir spent the rest of the meeting with his gaze on the greasy haired youth. He had planned on going to confront him before he managed to talk himself down. It didn’t matter what they thought of his pup, Lupin didn’t belong to them, or with them. He eyed Uma as she mingled with the deatheater’s her small sudo-pack right behind her as always. He worried about her. These people did not see them as their equals, he was painfully aware of that. And while she believed Voldemort would help their people, he knew that this so-called Dark lord would only tolerate them. As unfortunate as it was, that was more than he could say for the ministry.

“Uma, are you coming back to the pack with me tonight?” He asked, though he already knew the answer. She was growing; it was only natural for her to disperse from her parent pack, wanting to start her own.

“No, I think I’ll stay here. I’m sure you are busy with your newly returned pup.” the young she wolf turned around to look at him, her yellow eyes narrowed with an almost acustionary glint in them.

Fenrir shook his head sighing to himself, she was a firecracker just like her mother had been. As a father that made him proud, his daughter was so strong, bold, intelligent. Everything her mother would have wanted for her. As an Alpha however, he could sense the potential danger in being challenged, he knew he shouldn’t stand for it. But when he looked at Uma, he was always reminded of the two women he had lost, his mother, and his mate. So he let things slide that he normally wouldn’t. He didn’t bother to respond as he grabbed his coat and headed towards the door. He had acquired some pocket money from the Lestrange boy. He was nice enough as far as purebloods went, joining the deatheater’s ranks only on his fathers insistence. There was a small muggle town nearby, they needed some supplies and he was sure the pups would enjoy a treat. He smiled to himself as he stepped out into the light snowfall and headed down the road on foot almost effortlessly. He paused on the road wondering for a moment why the area looked familiar to him. After a moment it slowly dawned on him that he’d grown up here. If he bothered to look he would likely find the small manor he had lived in with his mother before her passing. But he pushed away those thoughts. It didn’t matter now, his mother was gone, his deadbeat father as well, having lost all his wealth, he had died penniless and alone. Exactly what he had deserved. His mother, she had deserved better, a mail order bride from Greece, cut off from all family and support. Left to die of illness and leave her young son orphaned. Fenrir stopped in his tracks and swore softly at the bitter tears that threatened to fall. He thought he was over this. It wasn’t worth crying about and he wasn’t a scared child anymore. He stood there on the path and took a moment, closing his eyes and focusing on the world around him everything that was before him. A family of squirrels asleep in their nest, guarded against the february chill. A vixen close by watching him likely before backing off to find some unsuspecting rabbit. And himself, his wolf beside him, inside of him, part of his entire essence. He was here and now. His pack needed him to be grounded to watch for their future. He opened his eyes again and continued on his way towards the town. 

Buying the supplies and treats for the pup’s didn’t take long, and as he entered the cave he felt a wave of relief wash over him. The Families were milling about settling down their pups for the night, the treats would have to wait for tomorrow, Anya was sitting on her cot reading a book by wandlight near the orphaned pups who were all safe in their beds. He looked around taking mental stock of who was there, who was missing. He frowned slightly at a few transient wolves who were settled on the floor near the entrance. Cain had obviously approved them staying the night, that wasn’t an issue. But the thought that this could be the fate in store for Remus was not lost on him. Some of them of course were young potential alpha’s looking to start their own families and pack. But most were ones who had never settled into a pack and likely never would, their wolves were feral, dangerous. More than once had he clashed with one or two during a full moon. Fenrir turned his attention away from them and took his supplies to their makeshift pantry, as he was putting away the eggs Anya approached to help him. 

“You are late, did everything go well?” The She-wolf gave him a stern intense look. She didn't trust Voldemort, and Fenrir did not blame her. 

“I was getting groceries, I just stayed a little longer to talk to Uma.” He sighed and closed the cold storage. “Everything is fine Anya, you and Cain will be the first to know if it’s not.” Fenrir’s gaze lingered on a bullet scar in her chest and sighed. “You are safe here. I’ll never let anyone hurt you or the pack. Trust me.” 

Anya stood looking at him for a moment before she took his hand and rested her forehead against his, she squeezed his hand gently. “I do trust you. You are a great leader. But you have to take care of yourself as well.” she pulled away and moved a bag of rice to the dry storage. “If anything happens to you….”

“Then Cain will protect the pack.” Fenrir replied firmly, he hoped to calm her fear as well as assure anyone listening in that they would always be in good hands. “I know it’s not ideal, I’ll.. think of something.” he said in a far softer voice. Admittedly he wasn’t sure what they could do, who would help them when everyone it seemed hated them. Anya just smiled that small, sad smile of hers and finished putting away the supplies. 

“Of course you will. Goodnight Fenrir.” she headed back to her cot while fenrir headed back towards his personal den. 

As he laid on his bed Fenrir found himself missing the presence of his pup. Remus as much as he had maintained that he was looking forward to leaving, had been good company. He sighed and looked up at the hole above him seeing the moon slowly making its way overhead. It was beautiful, comforting. He remembered his mother had worshipped it, as her people had once upon a time, and now it felt like he was just always chasing after it. As he watched the moon moving overhead, Fenrir determined he needed better advice. Sometime soon he would take his pup to meet the Grand wolf.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter two is up! I will be attempting to upload a chapter a week! Also I apologize that this chapter is shorter than the last one.

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first work posted here. sorry for any mistakes.
> 
> Edit: sorry for the delay in chapters. I've been dealing with some personal issues surrounding a sick elderly pet. I hope to add another chapter soon (3/10/2021)


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